Just when I was thinking that the authors of all my favorite webcomics were torturing me with the slowest updates possible, one of them condescends to supply me with THREE TIMES THE UPDATES PREVIOUSLY EXPECTED. Apparently, my friends, this had been going on for ONE SOLID DAMNED WEEK before I realized.
Thank you so much, http://untoward.livejournal.com/ and Emily. I think that I may cry.
THOSE ARE THE HAPS, MY FRIENDS.